About two days ago my son asked me if I saw the big bee on the window, seeing how I just got up I grunted no and left it at that. When I was more coherent I had a look my self, well it was not a bee but a wasp and a damn big one at that. He is still there stuck to our screen as he did when he landed I guess. Dead as a door nail, he has no visible damage so I expect the cold must have killed him and he never got a chance to get back to his hive. He is in good condition, and if there was a way to get him I would but alas there is not. I cannot open the screen and we are on the second floor so if I flicked him off he would be lost in the grass. My wife wanted me to knock him off the screen yesterday but I said no, leave him there and I will now call him Herman. In all honesty I am waiting to see how long he will last before he either falls off; blows away or a bird eats him. The cool thing is when you go over and look at him through the window you can see his eyes very evil looking to say the least. Anyway must go and get ready to get on the phone have a good one everyone, boring story I know but maybe I will have something better tomorrow. Talk to you all later.
I got this story in an email and firgured I would post it because I laughed my ass off when I read it.
This was the title of an article in the Calgary Sun.
In summary, the police arrested Ward Branham, a 22-year-old white male, resident of Lethbridge, Alberta, in a pumpkin patch at 11:38 p.m. on Friday.
Ward will be charged with lewd and lascivious behaviour, public indecency, and public intoxication at the Calgary courthouse on Monday.
The suspect explained that as he was passing a pumpkin patch he decided to stop.
"You know, a pumpkin is soft and squishy inside, and there was no one around there for miles. At least I thought there wasn't," he stated in a phone interview.
Ward went on to say that he pulled over to the side of the road, picked out a pumpkin that he felt was appropriate to his purposes, cut a hole in it, and proceeded to satisfy his alleged "need."
"I guess I was just really into it, you know?" he commented with evident embarrassment.
In the process, Ward apparently failed to notice a police car approaching and was unaware of his audience until officer Brin Taylor approached him.
"It was an unusual situation, that's for sure," said officer Taylor. "I walked up to (Ward) and he's...just working away at this pumpkin. "
Taylor went on to describe what happened when SHE approached Ward. "I just went up and said, "Excuse me sir, but do you realize that you are screwing a pumpkin?"
He froze and was clearly very surprised that I was there, and then looked me straight in the face and said, ...
"A pumpkin? Damn...is it midnight already?"
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